My monstrous body is sitting on top of your chest. We both find it’s easier to conceptualize of things like this, and I’m relieved to be out of your body at least for a few minutes. There’s no room for me, anyway, so we’re both crushed together in an awkward embrace, but it’s still better.

You wish I had been a little nicer. I wish you had been a little nicer.

I wish I had ridden more horses. You wish you had ridden more horses.

Who’s going to take care of Bloaty?

That just makes us sad.

Oh my God, what if Lamzy gets her? Fuck.

The dark is a great place to replay random scenes from our life.

Remember the first time we tried to be spontaneous and kiss Lamzy, and our lips met their stupid spandex suit, and they got mad because we got them dirty?


Remember when we started putting on weight?


Oh, you don’t want to watch home movies anymore.


That’s okay.

Can we watch another movie?

Yeah. Hold on.


We can watch Shrek.